I’m In Competition With No One!

I once had this so called friend that had trouble offering encouragement or guidance. Instead he would take great pleasure in trying to make me feel like absolute crap. He would start off a conversation and for the first few seconds I was lead to believe he was interested in me. Within no time I realised he only wanted to talk about himself and all the things he had done.

He would talk the talk, but he wasn’t necessarily walking the walk. It was always “Hi, what are you doing with your life?” then the rest of the conversation revolved around him in one way or another. There was never any real interest in how I was as person. If I said I had walked 5 miles that day, he would say he had walked 10 miles and so on.

He would tell me I was being too picky for going for what I wanted in life and make out my goals were impossible to reach. Then in the same breath he was striving for the same and struggling to get where he wanted to be. “Isn’t it too late for you?” He once asked me. I laughed to myself, why would it be too late? I’m still living and breathing so how is it too late? Is there a time limit I’m unaware of?

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The funny thing is he was in a similar predicament to me! Although he would never admit it, since he tried to glamorize his life each time he told one of his tales. I can understand him wanting the grass to look greener on his side and this being his way of dealing with his situation. However there is no need to put others down!

One day it hit me…Why am I entertaining him? Why am I  justifying myself? It’s my life! He clearly got kicks out of trying to put me down or he was seeking a confidence boost, but trying to compete with me will not help the issues under the surface. If this is the kind antics you carry on with, then you my friend are not my friend!

There is no competition, there is no finish line and you have not won! There was never a race; the only race anyone should have to put before them is the race against time. You may have exceeded your goals and people’s expectations, but please take a minute to come back down to earth.

I am taking a leaf out of my own book and resorting back to keeping my personal life goals-personal. If I’m winning then its’ because I’m competing against myself, if I’m ever losing then it’s up to me to decide this and continue to strive for what I want.

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6 thoughts on “I’m In Competition With No One!

  1. I absolutely love this!!! The only person that we should be competing with is the person that we were yesterday. And the only One whom we should compare ourselves is to Christ!
    This post is the truth. Glad that you remained encouraged!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I agree with your lovely friend Grace. We are our worst critic but we are also our biggest competitor. I once had a friend very similar to yours (ha, it was a male too!). After some time of remaining silent, I called him out on his behaviours. The bottom line was that he wanted to be liked by everyone. In order to be a true friend, I felt obligated to tell him that his talk did not encourage people to like him nor did it allow anyone to see who he really was. My conversation with my friend did create some changes but I don’t feel they were permanent. I haven’t really spoken to him in years 😦

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    • That’s very true, we are our worst critics! Wow, I take it he didn’t take it too well? He was so far off with his techniques. I found this quote yesterday ” Love everyone but don’t be everyone’s friend. Everybody can’t be your friend! Some people are easier to love from a distance”. I would rather have a small group of friends I can be myself around instead of trying so hard to impress everyone. No matter what there will someone out there that doesn’t like you.

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      • He didn’t at first. After the conversation, he disappeared for about 2 weeks. Then (following gut instinct), I opened my front door and he was standing at the bottom of my porch. (He hadn’t knocked). Apparently he had been standing there for nearly 3 hours trying to figure out what to say to me in regards to his issues. Needless to say, we talked more indepth and he started to be more of an observer rather than a liar.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I hope in time to come he appreciates your talk. It’s not everyday someone will take time out to do so. It could have ended up a lot worse.

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