~ My Letter To Fear inspired me to write this quote.
~ My Letter To Fear inspired me to write this quote.
I started writing this post a few weeks ago, I was inspired by Anastasia’s post Lightbringer. Have a little read, you will understand the connection… I hope! I found her post thought provoking and I immediately started to think about taking risks and the fear of rejection. I love the ending in particular.
For as long as I can remember, you have always tried your hardest to be a part of my life. You were always the unwanted guest that insisted on staying beyond your non-existent welcome. I stupidly let you stay and you admittedly corrupted my thoughts. You would whisper in my ear right before I had plucked up enough courage to take action; implying that it was almost impossible for me to succeed and I believed you!
In the past you made it seem like hearing the word ‘No’ was the worst thing in the world. Instead of encouraging me to go ahead and take risks; you somehow convinced me to take a back seat and watch… Watch possibly the best thing that could ever happen to me, happen to someone else or not happen at all! Unfortunately, I’m now left with a heap of what if’s.
I now realise that there is a 50/50 chance of hearing ‘No’ and a 50/50 chance of hearing ‘Yes’. No one likes being rejected; however rejection is a part of life! I hear the word ‘No’ all the time and it is inevitable that I will hear it again! The same goes for hearing the word ‘Yes’! I’ve learned that I will never know the outcome unless I go for it and who knows I may be pleasantly surprised.
I’ve always told myself that I would never allow anyone to have control over me, then right before my eyes you somehow managed to manipulate my thoughts. I often wonder how life would have been if I hadn’t met you or if I had stood up to you sooner. Your visits are less frequent nowadays, I don’t feel obliged to open the door to you anymore and I’m starting to think that you get the picture.
So Fear, how will you attempt to obstruct my thoughts today? You won’t! I won’t let you interfere anymore, you have caused enough damage! Please understand that you are no longer welcome here.
Don’t forget to visit Anastasia’s blog, it is one of my favourites! http://angirach.wordpress.com/
If I had to narrow it down to one thing, it would be my family! No matter if it’s rain or shine my family are always there for me. We are a close knit family, It’s always nice to know I have my little support unit.
I look forward to our regular catch ups, which sometimes last longer than anticipated. We spend a lot of time sharing stories, reminiscing, laughing and exchanging advice.
I want them to have the very best in life because they truly do deserve it!
What makes you happy?
”If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer will always be no. If you don’t step forward, you will always be in the same place.”
There are 24 hours in a day and the moment something trivial happens, we automatically say “Today isn’t my day”. When we are faced with a difficult situation we say “Today isn’t my day”, even when we know we are capable of getting through it.
Why wouldn’t you consider today as being your day? You’re alive; there are new opportunities for you and endless possibilities. Why does the phrase “Today isn’t my day” even come to mind? We are self consciously telling ourselves that it isn’t our day and we have the power to make it our day.
Looking back I realise that some of the ‘bad days’ I’ve experienced weren’t even all that bad. Instead of saying “Today isn’t my day”; I’ve started saying “It’s one of those days”. Today I was faced with a difficult situation. I could have easily resorted to claiming it wasn’t my day, but I didn’t! Why? Because I know I will get past it.
If your day or year so far isn’t going your way, remind yourself that you have the rest of the year to make things happen for you! In fact, you have the rest of your life to make things happen for you!
Today is your day along with the rest of the days in the year!
It was a room full of empty desks with no warmth or interacting going on. There was just silence and animosity in the air. It was a place once described as a fun and friendly environment. It definitely wasn’t living up to its expectations and it was only day one. On paper it looked great, it was right up my street. I ignored my first impressions as I was excited about the new chapter in my life. Little did I know that everything would take a 360 degree spin.
True colours slowly started to seep through the cracks in the walls. The tense environment became almost unbearable, it was difficult to get up every morning and convince myself everything was okay. Things weren’t adding up, I felt uneasy and I knew something wasn’t right.
The rumours I had heard through the grapevine were starting to make perfect sense. I needed to know where I stood. I confronted the situation and the response was sugar coated, then put aside as I was reassured all was well. I knew it wasn’t, but I smiled and left it at that.
I was back to being trapped in the corner with no clue what was going on in my own surroundings. The whispering continued and I tried to take everything in my stride. I wanted this so much and I couldn’t even concentrate.
False accusations started to echo in the room. I was genuinely confused as I was doing everything I was asked to do. I bit my tongue when something out of line had been directed at me. I tried to convince myself it would be worth it, I wanted this for so long. Dishonesty had now replaced the silence in the room. I couldn’t take it anymore, I knew today was the day.
Part Two: http://wp.me/p4xLH1-4X
I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately. I thought about some of the things I have learned over the years. Here is a collection of 10 of my biggest life lessons:
1. Accept compliments!
Don’t question everyone that compliments you. I’m pretty? What me? Really? On what planet? Are you sure? All this is unnecessary, a simple thank you will do. Let it sink in, it was a compliment directed at you, enjoy!
2. Spontaneity is the way forward
Being spontaneous is the best way to go. Some of the most memorable outings have been unplanned. Is it me or does planning sometimes suck out all the fun from the get go? When my friends call with last minute plans; 98% of the time we have the most fun! I find it’s the events that take longer to organise that don’t always end well.
3. There is no obligation
If you don’t want to do something, don’t! The keyword here is “Obligation”, if it is your job/duty to do so, I’m advising you to do it! This applies to other scenarios.. We sometimes do things to please others and there is no harm in doing so! However, if something isn’t your cup of tea, don’t feel as though you always have to say yes. With that being said, always make sure you are at least being open minded which brings me to my next lesson…
4. Be open minded
Explore other options and leave your comfort zone once in a while. Your friends may have invited you to a Roller Disco, you’ve never been, but for some reason you don’t want to go. Think of all the reasons why you don’t want to go and weight up your options. If sitting at home watching TV is your only other option, then why not at least give it a go. It is an opportunity to try something new with the possibility of meeting new people. Once you’ve tried it, you can then cross it off your list! Sitting too comfortably in the comfortable zone could mean you are missing out in the long run.
5. You don’t need to justify yourself!
My mum has been saying this to me for years. If you make a decision, it is your choice to go ahead with it. If you are happy with your decision and it isn’t affecting anyone else; why do you need to explain yourself? People can plug you all they want, but it is your prerogative to divulge. Try it one day; instead of replying with a full blown reply to justify yourself, say you did it because you wanted to.
6. Not everyone is going to like you!
Don’t spend time thinking through the reasons why someone could possibly dislike you. Throw that thought to the back of your mind. If someone wants to waste time and energy hating you, then leave them to it! You have bigger fish to fry my friend! Always remind yourself which bill of yours they are contributing to. Oh… they don’t pay any of your bills?
7. Leave the excuses at home!
We all do it. We get to work a little late and say “My alarm didn’t go off”, when deep down we know it did! Admit it, your Pillow asked you to stay 5 mins longer and you couldn’t resist! One day I was running a little late for work, I had already thought of an excuse to use, instead I said ”Today I was disorganized, I need to sort out my time management”. My manager did not expect that response, he let it slide due to me being honest. Take responsibility for your actions!
8. Kill them with kindness!
This can apply to all aspects of your life. If anyone has anything bad to say about you, be kind! Do not stoop to their level; I know it’s easier said than done, but at the end of the day they are only making themselves look bad! If you know it is out of character for you to mirror their actions, then continue as you were. At least no one can badmouth you for being too kind.
9. Voice your opinions
If you have something to say, say it! Don’t be that person that has a zillion things going through their mind throughout a discussion, yet hesitates to say a word. Be bold; bring it to light, there and then! I was once a very shy girl. I would sit quietly in the corner and barely say anything to anyone. You know that saying “The shy girl catches the worm”, she doesn’t! (I’m aware this isn’t the actual saying). I wasn’t put on this earth to mimic a tree, no sir! Now I’ve started, I can’t stop and won’t stop!
10. Be yourself
You are unique, so embrace it! Do whatever blows your hair back. You are a one off, limited edition, non-refundable, non-exchangeable bundle of delightfulness. It’s kind of like when you are proposing your business idea, there’s always a unique selling point. Remind yourself of your unique qualities and run with it!
You may feel like the world is on your shoulders and you have nowhere to run. You may feel as though the world is against you and you’re unable to escape your current predicament. It happens to the best of us! I’ve been there and I have memorabilia to prove it! One thing I’ve learned is; moping around doesn’t get you anywhere!
If you feel as though things couldn’t get any worse for you; then prove it to yourself! Don’t dwell on it for too long, wipe your tears and try to make the best of your situation. Tell yourself the only way is up, it does work! Of course your problems will not miraculously disappear overnight (if only it was that easy!), it does takes time!
Some problems are more difficult to solve, this doesn’t necessarily mean there is no way out. If every day was easy, how would you expect to grow as a person? If you were not faced with these challenges, would you be the person you are today?
“Every day may not be a good day, but there is something good in everyday!”
It’s up to us to make a conscious effort to find the good in each day, no matter how big or small! I’ll put my hands up and say that I often overlook so many things in my life. I’ve realised that many of these things are the things that give me life! I strongly believe that there are endless possibilities of better days occurring, when you’re hopeful!
When you reach out to someone and they are thankful, it is one of the best feelings! You can’t expect people to always be kind towards you; sometimes it may seem like receiving a simple “Hello” or “Thank you” is like getting blood out of a stone.
I encounter all kinds of people on a daily basis; some will make a conscious effort to be kind or show their appreciation, then there are those who barely acknowledge my existence.
I always consider the fact that people have their own problems to deal with and it doesn’t necessarily mean they are not grateful. I once had a lady approach me to apologize for being in a bad mood the previous day; she thought she may have come across as rude. I assumed she had a lot on her plate, I didn’t take it to heart and I said it was okay. The fact she came back to apologize says a lot!
I am not excusing those who are flat out rude! Yesterday me and a few others went out of our way to help a man and he didn’t say thank you to either of us. Apparently this is always the case with him, I will never forget him and it’s for all the wrong reasons! I wouldn’t want people to remember me for my misdemeanors. In the end he didn’t even get what he wanted and I’m sure you can guess the reason why.
I always make sure I say “Please” and “Thank you” first and foremost. There are times I may not feel like myself, a passer by will say “Good morning” and that alone helps to lift my mood. I’m sure you can think of a time when this has happened to you!
I’m not saying you should go out of your way to be kind to random people at every given opportunity. Do it from the goodness of your heart! It shouldn’t feel like a chore! Acts of kindness shouldn’t be for your own good or seen as a chance to seek praise. Show your appreciation whenever you can and let people know that you are grateful.
Initiating acts of kindness can be rewarding. When the receiver shows their appreciation that is a bonus! Kindness doesn’t cost a thing! It could make someone’s day!
“Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of human change.”
Bob Kerrey (1943) American Politician