The Sweet ‘n’ Sour Fruit Tale Part 1

Writing 101, Day Twelve: (Virtual) Dark Clouds on the Horizon: Write a post inspired by a real-world conversation.

This conversation took place 5 years ago, it is a true story and I still remember it to this day. We’ll call these two Arnold and Beth. They clicked from day one; Arnold found beauty in the way Beth spoke and Beth felt comfortable in Arnold’s presence. Beth struggled to express how she truly felt, so she hid behind her sarcasm and witty remarks. One day Beth started talking in riddles to display her affection. Arnold didn’t look at her like she was crazy or question her sanity, he riddled with her!

“We need to talk”.

“Okay then let’s talk”.

“There is this fruit and sometimes it can be sweet and on the rare occasion its sour. I don’t know which one I’m getting on a daily basis. I’m uncertain if this fruit is constantly this sweet or if it’s only around me. I don’t know if I should bother with this fruit or if I should throw it away. What do you think?”.

“First you need to ask yourself if this fruit gives you food for thought. If you feel like you are stuck in between the fruit being sweet or sour, maybe you should open the fruit up more and then you’ll get to know it a little better”.

” In a way the fruit does give me food for thought, I wouldn’t bother with it if it didn’t. The fruit is intriguing and I think about it a lot. I’m told I keep my guard up, but if I knew more about the fruit, then the fruit may end up finding out more about me”.

” I think you explained it in the best way. Its the fear of not knowing enough about the fruit apart from the sweet layer that makes you wonder if there is anything beneath this layer. I’m pretty sure the fruit would like to know if there are anymore layers to a particular fruit just as much as you do”.

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Arnold attempted to let Beth know how he felt in the past and she pushed him away. Beth hoped the riddling session would open new doors, however she somehow slipped back into her old ways. Arnold was left in a confused state of mind yet again and the sweet ‘n’ sour fruit tale continued!

9 Lessons I’ve Learned From My Mum

1. Take everyone with a pinch of salt
Not everyone will be to your liking. People have said that I see the best in people and this isn’t necessarily the case. I’m far from naive; I’ve been taught that giving people the power to annoy me will not benefit me in the long run. There are situations that could have turned out the complete opposite, but I refused to let people get the better of me. Of course there are times when this is hard to do, I am only human! Accept differences whenever possible and keep it moving!
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2. Every spoil is a style
There have been a few times I’ve questioned my mum’s outfits, although she wears her clothes well! My mum responds with her famous line “I paid for it, it’s clean and I didn’t rob anyone. So I will wear whatever I want”. Wear whatever you feel comfortable in!

3. Dance like nobody is watching
No matter what the occasion is my mum will dance the day or night away. She is the party! Wherever there is music she will dance, even if there isn’t music I can guarantee she will make her own. I’ve been in the middle of a conversation with her and I’ve turned around to find her dancing on the other side of the room. Dance your troubles away!
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4. Don’t put dampers on it
If I’m frowning and my mum enters the room, I know I have to turn that frown upside down ASAP! She will question me and once I begin to reply, she will cut me off and say “I don’t want any negativity in here” then a little rant will follow this. You may be wondering why she didn’t give me a chance to reply, this is her method of helping me get back on track and it works! I grew up on tough love and it didn’t do me any harm! Try to remain positive!

5. Do not rely on anyone
No expectations = No disappointments. If someone pulls through, then great! If they don’t, no biggie! We all need a helping hand from time to time, however if you can do it yourself then…

6. Do it yourself
I can’t even count the amount of times I have witnessed my mum do things I wouldn’t even imagine doing. Whilst my friends were playing outside; I was inside helping my mum plaster a ceiling or assisting her as she built a wardrobe from scratch! I remember a neighbour saying that my mum and another lady on my street were manlier than all the men on the street put together (There was a compliment in there somewhere I promise lol). If my mum can do it, so can I! I am not implying that I will be making a wardrobe from scratch though.
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7. Friends come and go
Over the years I have realised the amount of friends I have is insignificant. I can count all my friends on one hand and that’s okay because they are the ones that have been there for the long haul. My mum would tell me about what to expect in terms of friendship groups and I didn’t imagine it coming true. I guess my mum knows best!

8. Passion is your oyster
I’ve never come across anyone as passionate as my mum. I almost feel as though I’m looking into her heart as she talks. She was lucky enough to find her passion at a young age and it is has stuck with her to this day.
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9. One kindness deserves another
I consider this to be my mum’s all time favourite quote. She has mentioned this quote over and over recently. I can hear her in my head right now saying this quote to my brother. If someone is kind to you, be kind back!

 

Self-Love Vs. Self-Hatred

Writing 101, Day Seven: Give and TakeWrite a post based on the contrast between two things — whether people, objects, emotions, places, or something else.

Self-Love= SL
Self-Hatred= SH

SL: I look beautiful today! My skin is glowing!
SH: Who am I trying to kid? My skin looks terrible!
SL: Maybe I’ll wear the new dress I purchased yesterday.
SH: Second thoughts I don’t want to draw any attention to myself.
SL: I don’t care what anyone thinks! Every spoil is a style.
SH: I wonder what people will think of me if I wear it.
SL: As long as I’m comfortable that’s all that matters!
SH: I think I’ll wear jeans and a t-shirt instead that way no one will notice me. I’m returning the dress.

SL: The world is my oyster, there are so many possibilities!
SH: Ugh my life sucks, I was born unlucky!
SL: I know my capabilities and strengths, I will go far!
SH: I have so many weaknesses, I’m never going to get where I want to be.
SL: This job is right up my street! I’m going for it!
SH: Why would they choose me? There’s probably someone better suited.
SL: You know what; I love being me! I’m not perfect, but I will always try my hardest to better myself.
SH: I wonder what it would feel like to be someone else for a day. Things never go my way, I give up!
SL: If I can’t love myself, how can I expect anyone else to?

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What’s In The Box? (It’s My Birthday!)

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Each year my loved ones ask what I would like for my birthday. I usually browse the internet searching for possible gifts and then I narrow down the list.

Two years ago I jokily asked for a money tree (as you do) and to my surprise my friend turned up at my doorstep with a money plant. Luckily he didn’t take it literally and think I was after money! It was as if he could see beneath the surface; he completely understood that there was some truth in my joke. I was amazed by the fact that he had given my gift so much thought and his gift still means so much to me!

“I promised to take care of Monty The Money Maker and rub his leaves regularly”.

Recently I was asked what I wanted for my birthday and my reply was “I would like a box” A box? Yes, a box of happiness! The responses I received were along the lines of “Wouldn’t you prefer something more realistic like shoes or clothes Rochelle?” You mean materialistic? To me what I’m asking for is as realistic as it gets.

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I would be lying if I said material things didn’t make me happy. I would love a new wardrobe so I could reenact London Fashion Week on my daily strolls! However, if I mistake a new wardrobe for anything more than short term happiness it will only lead me back to square one.

I’m not knocking material gifts; I am so grateful for all the gifts I receive, I’m merely looking at things from a different perspective! Gifts are a way of showing affection, they can come in many forms and they serve the purpose of making the receiver happy. But what about the non-materialistic things we often take for granted that contribute to our long term happiness?

I know you can’t put happiness in a box and hand it to someone, but if my loved ones were to hand me an empty box it would speak volumes! The last year has been a roller-coaster and they have been by my side every step of the way. Little do they know that they have all contributed to my happiness! I am truly blessed beyond measure! All I ask is that they continue to fill my life with joy…

So what else is in this box of happiness besides my family and friends? Everything I’m grateful for..

  • The knowledge I’ve gained
  • The lessons I’ve learned

And last but not least, the little things!

I’m so thankful for the present, I will remind myself that it is gift and undoubtedly the greatest gift I will ever receive!

Happy Birthday to me! One year older, one year wiser!ballonies

Do You Really Need Someone?

We all need someone whether we want to admit it or not. I’m sure you can think of a few people you need in your life! I’m talking about in general, but I want to touch on the subject on a personal level! In theory we are all born alone and we die alone. However many of us feel as though we want or need a companion, it’s natural!

I asked my friend if he thought there were people that genuinely wanted to be alone long term and he said ‘Yes’. I’m unable to apprehend why anyone would choose to be alone long term, although it isn’t hard to understand what may have triggered their thoughts which lead to their decision. Surely there must be a part of them that desires some sort of a companionship?

What are your thoughts?

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7 Tips For Living The Single Life

I’m in one of those long distance relationships where my boyfriend lives in the future. Right now he may be thinking about what he is having for dinner or whether or not he should go to the gym…Whilst I’m here writing about how much I don’t know about him, since I don’t know who he is yet! Are you in the same boat as me? Don’t stress!

1. Good things comes to those who wait
To an extent, if you are sitting at home waiting for the postman to deliver your new spouse, you may be left disappointed. If only it were that easy! Get out and mingle with people or use the internet if need be, you can meet people practically anywhere. As long as you are in the game, who knows who may come your way!

2. Spend time getting to know you
Me time is essential! Its okay to enjoy your own company and you may even find it useful when you get into a relationship. When you and your partner spend time apart at least you won’t be a lost chicken wondering what to do with yourself.

3.  The time isn’t right
Before you start running through all the imaginary faults you have, stop right there…thank you very much! There is nothing wrong with you, there is someone for everyone and your time will come!

4. Don’t be too picky
It’s okay to have a preference, but there is a thin line between being picky and having a preference. If you wait around for the perfect guy/girl who ticks every single box, your grandkids will probably be in a relationship before you (Ok…you get my point!).

5.  You never meet anyone
Really? Please tell me more…Let’s be honest, you do encounter people that are attracted to you. Some show interest and then they end up in the friendzone. One day you might look back and wonder how such a nice girl/guy ended up in the friendzone. You put them there! Were you waiting for some other lucky bugger to scoop them up? Make sure you don’t make the same mistake again! Remember the guy/girl that said hello to you a few days ago, you walked right past them and you didn’t even give them the time of day! Think very hard before you claim you never meet anyone!

6. Smile!
You never know who’s watching! If you look across the room and see someone frowning would you really want to approach them? Have you ever heard someone say “It was their frown that attracted me to them”… No! NO! No! Smiles are so inviting and we automatically feel the need to go over and talk to the person. It’s only right we practice our smiling exercises daily and smile more!

7. Have fun!
Always remember to enjoy the present moment  🙂

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*Disclaimer* These tips are based on my own opinions and experiences.

What Makes You Happy?

If I had to narrow it down to one thing, it would be my family!  No matter if it’s rain or shine my family are always there for me. We are a close knit family, It’s always nice to know I have my little support unit.

I look forward to our regular catch ups, which sometimes last longer than anticipated. We spend a lot of time sharing stories, reminiscing, laughing and exchanging advice.

I want them to have the very best in life because they truly do deserve it!

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What makes you happy?

Last And Most Certainly Not Least….

Question: In your imaginary award acceptance speech (yes, we know you have one), who’s the very last — and most important — person you thank?

… My mum!

The best teacher I could ever ask for. Nothing compares to having her words of wisdom on my own doorstep! I have been asked where my morals stem from and they all stem from her. My mum has molded me into the person I am today, I couldn’t imagine doing anything without my mothers blessing.

She’s one of the reasons why I got my job, I was asked who inspired me and I said my mum did. My boss said my eyes lit up and I smiled from ear to ear as I spoke about her. I wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for her encouragement and guidance. I can’t thank her enough!

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In Response to The Daily Post: Last But Not Least

10 Of My Biggest Life Lessons

I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately. I thought about some of the things I have learned over the years. Here is a collection of 10 of my biggest life lessons:

1. Accept compliments!

Don’t question everyone that compliments you. I’m pretty? What me? Really? On what planet? Are you sure? All this is unnecessary, a simple thank you will do. Let it sink in, it was a compliment directed at you, enjoy!

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2. Spontaneity is the way forward

Being spontaneous is the best way to go. Some of the most memorable outings have been unplanned. Is it me or does planning sometimes suck out all the fun from the get go? When my friends call with last minute plans; 98% of the time we have the most fun! I find it’s the events that take longer to organise that don’t always end well.

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3. There is no obligation

If you don’t want to do something, don’t! The keyword here is “Obligation”, if it is your job/duty to do so, I’m advising you to do it! This applies to other scenarios.. We sometimes do things to please others and there is no harm in doing so! However, if something isn’t your cup of tea, don’t feel as though you always have to say yes. With that being said, always make sure you are at least being open minded which brings me to my next lesson…

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4. Be open minded

Explore other options and leave your comfort zone once in a while. Your friends may have invited you to a Roller Disco, you’ve never been, but for some reason you don’t want to go. Think of all the reasons why you don’t want to go and weight up your options. If sitting at home watching TV is your only other option, then why not at least give it a go. It is an opportunity to try something new with the possibility of meeting new people. Once you’ve tried it, you can then cross it off your list! Sitting too comfortably in the comfortable zone could mean you are missing out in the long run.

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5. You don’t need to justify yourself!

My mum has been saying this to me for years. If you make a decision, it is your choice to go ahead with it. If you are happy with your decision and it isn’t affecting anyone else; why do you need to explain yourself? People can plug you all they want, but it is your prerogative to divulge. Try it one day; instead of replying with a full blown reply to justify yourself, say you did it because you wanted to.

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6. Not everyone is going to like you!

Don’t spend time thinking through the reasons why someone could possibly dislike you. Throw that thought to the back of your mind. If someone wants to waste time and energy hating you, then leave them to it! You have bigger fish to fry my friend! Always remind yourself which bill of yours they are contributing to. Oh… they don’t pay any of your bills?

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7. Leave the excuses at home!

We all do it. We get to work a little late and say “My alarm didn’t go off”, when deep down we know it did! Admit it, your Pillow asked you to stay 5 mins longer and you couldn’t resist! One day I was running a little late for work, I had already thought of an excuse to use, instead I said ”Today I was disorganized, I need to sort out my time management”. My manager did not expect that response, he let it slide due to me being honest. Take responsibility for your actions!

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8. Kill them with kindness!

This can apply to all aspects of your life. If anyone has anything bad to say about you, be kind!  Do not stoop to their level; I know it’s easier said than done, but at the end of the day they are only making themselves look bad! If you know it is out of character for you to mirror their actions, then continue as you were. At least no one can badmouth you for being too kind.

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9. Voice your opinions

If you have something to say, say it! Don’t be that person that has a zillion things going through their mind throughout a discussion, yet hesitates to say a word. Be bold; bring it to light, there and then! I was once a very shy girl. I would sit quietly in the corner and barely say anything to anyone. You know that saying “The shy girl catches the worm”, she doesn’t!  (I’m aware this isn’t the actual saying). I wasn’t put on this earth to mimic a tree, no sir! Now I’ve started, I can’t stop and won’t stop!

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10. Be yourself

You are unique, so embrace it! Do whatever blows your hair back. You are a one off, limited edition, non-refundable, non-exchangeable bundle of delightfulness. It’s kind of like when you are proposing your business idea, there’s always a unique selling point. Remind yourself of your unique qualities and run with it!

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You Live and You Learn!